I’ve got great news! I’ve just received an email offering to solve all of my manhood issues! Woohoo! I’m not quite sure who sent it because it appears that it was actually sent from my own email. It must be some sort of surprise late birthday present. Anyway, I look forward to seeing how this mysterious giver teaches me how to fix cars, build things out of wood, repair lawnmowers, read sci-fi, and other manly things that I have somehow missed out on in life.
So whoever you are, thank you so much for thinking of me.
Sincerely,
Ryan
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You're welcome. Happy birthday.